Be Who You've Always Wanted to Be

As the new year is approaching, I'm assuming most of us are inspired to set some resolutions and goals that are going to take our lives to the next level in 2011.  I am also assuming that for most of your resolutions, this is not the first time you've committed to them.  Why don't they happen for most of us?  Are we doomed to attempt the same resolutions year after year?  But of course not!  If you're going to start seeing the results you want, you need to know a few important things concerning your brain.

1.  Your brain has conscious and unconscious thoughts and actions.
2.  Conscious thoughts/actions are the things you intentionally and deliberately focus your mind to while unconscious thoughts/actions are things that you do or think when you don't have or don't make time to think it through.

3.  Most often, if your unconscious and conscious minds are battling, your unconscious will win because it requires the least effort.  The unconscious does not require will power, discipline, self-control, none of that.  You can just give up and the unconscious can take over, it's your mind's default.

4.  Resolutions are birthed in the conscious

So why share all this?  It's because I want all of you and myself to finally live lives we've been desiring for so long.  The way to live the life you want is to shift your focus from the conscious to the unconscious.  Let me give you some examples:

• Want to lose weight?  Instead of starting by making decisions on what you will and will not eat, exercises, etc, first decided to expose your mind to helpful content.  Don't read magazines or watch shows that make you feel inadequate but instead fill your mind with articles regarding help, inspiring stories about unlikely people achieving their goals, and anything else that informs you of healthy living and lets you know you can do it!
• Want to have a closer relationship with God?  Don't get focused on your do's and don'ts in the conscious level because the essence of who you are can really be seen when you're caught off guard. God's more concerned about what's going on in your mind and heart so start there.  Expose yourself to scripture specific to your desire.  Maybe you don't want to have anxiety anymore.  Read scripture about putting aside fear and taking on God's peace.  Watch and listen to online sermons on the topic.  Surround yourself with people who are free from anxiety.

In doing these things, we're changing and shaping how our mind reacts naturally.  Exposing our minds to filth or things that don't build us up is what's really holding us back.  So for 2011, start with the unconscious and I guarantee you that you'll see results!  It's already working for plenty of others, including me!

 For as a man thinks in his heart, so is he."  Proverbs 23:7

When I was 13...

When I was thirteen, I had oral sex with 4 guys in one night.  It started out with just two but then they called their friends and pretty soon, they were lined up and I was the prize.  I remember not understanding why it was such a big deal to them but enjoying the fact that all their eyes were focused on me.  It wasn't until the weekend ended and Monday brought on the realization that all the guys wanted was what they could get out of me and how it would make them feel.  They told the whole school and the girls (even though they were doing the same thing) called me sluts and the guys threw money at me in between classes.  Every time I saw any of the guys who were there that night, they gave me a look as if they'd conquered me, which to my understanding, they had.  People talk about hitting rock bottom.  That was mine.  Everyone treated me like trash and I felt like trash with no hope of things ever changing.  I'm so grateful for that humiliating experience.  It just so happened that the only group of people who didn't know what I did were the Christians so the people of Campus Crusade for Christ for high school students became my new friends.  I was mentored by two older women who repeatedly and gently told me not to sell myself short.  They told me that God had these things for my future:  a plan for my life, a trustworthy husband who would love me for me, and best of all, a heart to forgive me for everything I had done.

More than a decade later, those days are long gone.  The thought to share this story came because I remembered that this is an ongoing struggling for many women today.  It starts in the preteen years and goes on as long as we let it before we finally surrender our pain to God.  We'll find a healing that fills our void and holds us back from using our bodies for what it wasn't meant for.  Sex is not something you wait until you're old enough for.  Sex is supposed to be enjoyed forever with your spouse.  A spouse that has committed to spending their life actively loving you.  Without that, sex is full of hurt, guilt, and uncertainty and a couple of minutes of pleasure.  Ladies, if a guy loves you the way you really want him to love you, he won't have sex with you until he has said his "I dos".  Why?  Because he'll be thinking ahead and realizing how much it would hurt you if things didn't work out or how disappointed you'd be in yourself if you went against your standards. 

Don't sell yourself short.  Wait.  Let's be real; it's not always easy, but trust, it's worth it.

Lam 3:25 The LORD is good to those who wait for Him, To the person who seeks Him.

We Are All Meant to Shine as Children Do

What can take your freedom
Is it those layers of clothing you hide under
Or that food that you've sworn you'll never eat
Who can take your freedom
Is it that person you love who gives you glances of judgment and speak words that leave you feeling beaten
Or is it you, who gives it away so freely because you don't know its value

Everyday, you and I wake up ready to take on the day with a positive attitude feeling powerful beyond measure.  Throughout the day, we allow what we see in the mirror and how others treat us to bring us down.  Here's the truth:  there's no one else like you.  If you allow anything or anyone to make you feel like less than the amazing creation of the most high God, you lose the freedom to be amazing and enjoy living out your purpose in this generation.  Start valuing your freedom today.  Don't hide; the world would not be the same without you!

"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery"  Galatians 5:1